What I Wish I Knew as an Expat: My Do’s and Don’ts After 7 Years in Bangkok and a New Life in Barcelona

After spending more than seven years in Thailand as an expat with a global company, I thought I had seen and learned it all. But moving to Spain reminded me that every relocation brings a new learning curve. The truth is, no matter how many international assignments you’ve had, becoming an expat is never just a professional change, it’s a full-life transition.

So why this list?

Because if you're planning to move abroad, or you're already adjusting to a new life in a new country, it helps to hear from someone who’s been there. Twice.

From the heat and vibrance of Bangkok to the Mediterranean charm of Barcelona, these lessons hold up. I wrote this with both new and seasoned expats in mind. either moving solo or with a family, for work or for love.

Let’s start with the Do’s:

• Do your research. Before you arrive, understand what you’re stepping into. Look into the local culture, cost of living, healthcare system, safety, schooling, and housing. The more you know, the fewer surprises you'll face. I always join to an expat facebook and whatsapp group to have a brief knowledge and ask my questions beforehand. Also, working with a relocation agency helps a lot.

• Do learn the basics of the local language. You don’t need to be fluent, but knowing how to say hello, thank you, and ask for help can open doors, and hearts. It also shows you respect where you’ve landed.

• Do prepare emotionally. You might feel excited, anxious, lonely, or all of the above. That’s normal. Relocation brings emotional ups and downs, even when it’s something you wanted.

• Do build a local network. Join expat groups, parenting circles, or hobby-based meetups. These may just sound like social extras when you are setlling a new home, they’re emotional lifelines when things feel foreign and hard.

• Do stay open-minded. What’s different isn’t wrong. You’ll enjoy your new home a lot more if you lead with curiosity instead of comparison.

• Do take care of your admin early. Visas, healthcare registration, local tax ID, bank accounts, handle these early so they don’t become urgent problems later. Again, a relocation agency will help a lot.
  

• Do explore like a local. Get out of the expat comfort zone. Ride the metro. Eat where the locals eat. Walk without Google Maps. That’s how you build real connection.

• Do keep your ties to home alive. Staying in touch with friends and family helps you feel anchored, especially on days when everything feels uncertain.

• Do have a financial cushion. Things will go off plan. Having a buffer makes it easier to adapt without constant stress.

• Do give yourself time. Adjusting takes more than a few weeks. Be kind to yourself and to your family, if it doesn’t click right away.

Now, let’s talk about the Don’ts which are just as important. Maybe even more and they come from real moments I’ve lived through and what I observed within the expat groups all the time.

During my journey, I’ve experienced it all. I moved as a single woman, then as a married woman without kids, then again as a mom with two children.

Each chapter brought its own set of challenges. And through them, I learned that some things, especially the ones we tend to brush off can shape your experience more than you think.

These are the ones I urge you not to neglect.

Here are my list of Don'ts:

• Don’t expect it to feel like home immediately. You’re rebuilding everything from routines to relationships. It takes time for the new place to feel familiar. Even the supermarket isles are different now so grocery shopping will take a bit longer than before.

• Don’t compare constantly. Whether it’s food, weather, schools, or healthcare, comparison will rob you of the joy of discovering what’s new.

• Don’t isolate yourself. Even if you're naturally introverted, you still need people around you. Reach out. Say yes. Join in.

• Don’t overlook your mental health. Relocation stress is real. If you feel overwhelmed, it’s okay to ask for help. You don’t have to do it all alone.

• Don’t assume everyone speaks English. It’s frustrating, sure, but adjusting your expectations helps reduce disappointment and friction. You may feel awkward when you’re just starting to learn a new language, but that’s okay. That’s how kids learn right? Through trial, error, and curiosity. It’s actually endearing. Most people will appreciate the effort more than the grammar. So don’t worry if you sound funny. You’re learning, and that’s brave.

• Don’t avoid the bureaucracy. Paperwork is part of the deal. The earlier you deal with it, the smoother everything else goes.

• Don’t overshare complaints online. It’s okay to vent, but constant negativity can push away the very support systems you’re trying to build.

• Don’t stay in tourist mode for too long. It’s fun at first, but at some point, you’ll need real routines to make this life sustainable.

• Don’t underestimate cultural differences at work. Every country has its own work culture. Watch, learn, and ask. You’re not just learning a job, you’re learning how work is done here.

• Don’t rush to judge your experience. The early months are hard for everyone. Give it time before deciding whether this move was the right one.

If you're an expat or planning to become one, I hope this list gives you a head start or at least a little comfort that you're not alone.

Every move brings new lessons, and even after years of living abroad, I’m still learning. If you have tips or stories of your own, I’d love to hear them.

Fellow expats, what would you add to this list?

I’m sure there’s so much more we could share.

Let’s keep the conversation going.